By Marnie Florin: “I’m a Peace Corps Volunteer in The Gambia, West Africa, but before I left, I was obsessed with my iPhone and watched Gossip Girl. I love traveling, Radiohead, Murakami, cooking stir-fry, writing, TV on DVD, Ari Gold, etc. I have extraordinarily strong opinions, but try to keep an open mind.”
Completing your Peace Corps service is comparable to graduating from college in that you are thrown into the real world and suddenly have to start worrying about your future. A lot of us volunteers start applying to graduate schools and jobs months before we ever go home, but not my friend Amanda. She’s 26 years old, finished her PC service a few months ago and is relatively unconcerned about starting a career. She’s currently living at her parents’ house and working at Trader Joe’s, biding her time before she leaves for Alaska to go dog mushing. After that, she wants to go to South Korea for a few months to teach English. And that’s about as far as her future plans go.
On the other hand, my friend Mallory, also 26 years old, has a set career path. She just graduated law school, passed the Bar Examination in New York and now works for a prestigious law firm. Ten years ago, I would have definitively considered her more successful than Amanda. But not anymore.
Success has always been defined as something everyone strives for but only few achieve. In the past, financial stability and higher education were the dream, and those who had both were considered successful. But these days, it is not the doctor or lawyer who stands out anymore, but the girl who moves to Peru to farm and learn Spanish or the guy who works at an AIDS clinic in Rwanda.
As a result, our generation’s definition of success is no longer based on wealth and clout, but on happiness and individuality. In other words, it’s no longer impressive to make six figures if doing so makes you miserable.
Based on this definition, I would consider Amanda—who fearlessly does what she loves and refuses to adhere to society’s expectations—more successful than Mallory. Even though Mallory has a profitable and prestigious career, it doesn’t make her successful if she’s not happy doing it.
That’s not to say that Amanda hasn’t come to me and said, “Marnie, I’m 26 years old. I can’t keep doing this. I have to get a real job.” And to be honest, I can’t say I haven’t had those same thoughts about her. But, because our generation’s access to higher education and study abroad programs is more widespread than ever, we’ve realized that money isn’t life-changing enough to make working an awful 9-5 job worth it. That job will always be there, but the freedom to time to travel will not.
As long as Amanda’s not accruing any debt—which she isn’t—I see nothing wrong with her choice to put off starting a career in order to see more of the world and experience new ways of life, even at 26. It doesn’t make her a dreamer; it makes her a success.
Photo Credit: neogabox
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This post was mentioned on Twitter by edwardboches: Thoughtful piece about money vs happiness, materialism vs volunteerism and the decisions that Gen Y makes http://bit.ly/8jwfpI #tngg…
The only difference between Amanda and Mallory is that they're following their own definition of success. I think it's something true for many of us within our generation. We've heard it from our parents and teachers every year of our adolescence, “Find what you love. Do what you love.” Why this war cry? Because every year surveys were coming out about how depressed our nation's workforce has become. Even people earning 6 figures weren't feeling very successful. Our gen sees success ultimately for what it is–achieving the goals we set for ourselves.
I don't feel you made it clear if Mallory is in fact unhappy. You said yourself, do what expresses your individuality and makes you happy. This could be through wandering or staying close to home depending on the person. There's also the opportunity to take sabbaticals or find work that pays while exploring passions like traveling. I work in advertising (a few years back I was at Mullen with Edward) and now I'm following my dream of living outside of the US. I'm still doing advertising, but now I'm in Amsterdam traveling all over Europe. Something you really can't do without a job considering the exchange rate!
Marnie – cool concept for an article. I think the bottom line here is “happiness is success” and I couldn't agree with you more. I'm 24, less than 2 years out of University in Canada. About 8 months after I graduated, I traveled to Australia and New Zealand and had an awesome time. Was planning on being there working for 8-12 months and working. I lasted 4 months before I realized I would rather go and find career number one.
So I came home early, job hunted for 3.5 months, and found what I consider to be a dream career at this point of my life. I moved to a new city close to my hometown, and am still living the dream – couldn't be happier than working and living where I am. Fact is – I'll get the travel bug again and take off for another 2-3 months between jobs – but right now I'm doing what makes me happy
Great success definition by @Dylan as well – achieving the goals we set for ourselves.
Cheers,
Bobby
@bobbyhennessey
But what happens when you want everything? I feel trapped by my inability to have both the 6-figure job and the amazing multi-cultural traveling experiences. And, sadly, not many companies are hiring for the next Anthony Bourdain.
This article is almost interesting, but ultimately not. The reason: the way you've written it, you're assuming Mallory is unhappy, but don't know for sure. If she is happy in her law job, then she's a success, by your definition. If she's not, well, I'm not ready to call her a failure. Maybe it's the company and not the practice of law itself that has her down. Last, wandering aimlessly and doing odd jobs is cool, but only if it ultimately informs you how you truly want to live. Maybe you want to wander, maybe you want to apply your newfound knowledge of human nature to management.
Jeff (and Dylan), thank you for the comment. I understand your argument and I never would have written that Mallory is unhappy if I hadn't actually heard it from her personally. And I should have made it clear in the first paragraph. But by no means would I ever consider her a failure.
I think as a generation, we've become pretty self-sufficient. We understand that we are the ones in charge of our destiny. And I happen to agree with you– 10 years ago, as a 15 year-old, I would have considered Mallory the successful one and would have seen Amanda as, not a failure, but not someone I'd be able to relate to. Now that I can look back, I see that I've been in Amanda's shoes before, spending a summer in Greece living on pennies as a college student, and for a couple years now, I've been on a similar path as Mallory, working full time, and I understand that one person's path might not be the right path for someone else. Cheers to those who can carve their own path and achieve their goals. As Eleanor Roosevelt said, “The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams.”
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Marnie–I like how your article challenges how we as a generation define success. The meaning of success is shifting, and I agree that is no longer defined by money or prestige but in realizing your own goals (no matter how strange or insignificant they seem). Having the ability to not work full time and travel is a luxury, but leaving your comfort zone to live abroad is also incredibly brave. So proud of you!
Wow I LOVE this. Everyone defines success differently and it's great that our generation is seeing this and making their dreams happen- regardless of what society defines as being “successful”. No matter what you choose as your role in society hopefully it will be something that you love.