City nicknames: “City of Good Neighbors,” “City of No Illusions,” “Queen City,” “City of Light,” “Nickel City.”

Biggest Buffalo names: Nick Bakay, Wolf Blitzer, David Boreanaz, Charles Burchfield, Grover Cleveland, Cute is What We Aim For, Ani DiFranco, Millard Fillmore, F. Scott Fitzgerald, Ira Flatow, Doug Flutie, Goo Goo Dolls, E.B. Green, Terry Gross, Rick James, Patrick Kaleta, Jim Kelly, Tim Kennedy, Brian McKnight, “Baby” Joe Mesi, Chad Michael Murray, moe., Joyce Carol Oates, Tim Russert, Mark Twain, et al.

Most infamous Buffalo names: Patrick Kane, Scott Norwood, OJ Simpson, John Stevens.

The final resting place of: Barbara Franklin (Aretha Franklin’s mother), Rick James, William McKinley (sort of).

Best excuse to dress in costume: World’s Largest Disco – the one place where you’ll get laughed at if you’re not wearing go-go boots, spandex or an afro. Honorable mentions to the MASH Bash and the 80’s Bash.

Best Chinese food: It’s in Canada. Yeah, we cross the border for Chinese food.

Best underage bar: Also in Canada. Who needs a fake ID when you can party legally with your friends at 19 just a few minutes away?

Best place to take visitors: Niagara Falls – but the Canadian side; the U.S. side is sketchy.

Worst place to take visitors: Niagara Falls. Seriously, every time guests come to town, they just have to see the Falls. Until it turns purple and the fish start flying, I don’t need to see it again.

Best place to spend a nice day: Hanging out in Canal Side…oh, wait…Well, maybe some day.

Coolest party venue: The Central Terminal. Yes, the abandoned-and-in-disrepair Central Terminal.

Most accurate movie depiction of Buffalo: That scene in Bruce Almighty where the Buffalo Sabres win the Stanley Cup and people start burning cars, rioting, etc. With the exception of some green screen shots, the movie wasn’t filmed in Buffalo (and the sets look very little like Buffalo) but we’re all assuming that’s a pretty spot-on depiction of what will happen whenever that day comes.

Best way of rebuilding the city: See above. Then we can just start from scratch.

The best bar to get thrown out of: Anything on Chippewa – in a few months, it’ll be closed for underage drinking, then reopen under a new name/new management, and you’ll be allowed in again.

Best place to eat at 4am: Jim’s Steakout (open ‘til 5 and exponentially better after a night of drinking) or one of the 24-hour Greek-American diners (so you can eat breakfast before bed).

Biggest holiday: St. Patrick’s Day, Dyngus Day and Thanksgiving Eve – all of which revolve around a prominent ethnic group in the city, food and/or alcohol.

Best grocery store: Wegmans. Seriously – no sarcastic comment, no witty remarks, nothing. Just the Best. Grocery store. Ever.

Biggest claim to fame: Birthplace of the chicken wing. Buffalo, NY: Clogging arteries since 1964. Also, the word “buffalo,” used eight times creates a full sentence. And, fine, we get a lot of snow.

Best local foods: Beef on weck, Mighty Taco, Anderson’s ice cream, pizza and wings, Ted’s hot dogs, Louie’s sweet potato fries, Tim Hortons, Jim’s Steakout – pretty much anything that will clog your arteries and make you fat.

Biggest local debate: Duff’s v. Anchor Bar

Things we just don’t talk about: the Skyway, Bass Pro/Canal Side/the waterfront in general, the Kensington Expressway (a.k.a, the 33) cutting through the East Side, a certain pizza chain allegedly being a mafia front.

Cool things Buffalonians can do: go to and from another country in an hour (barring traffic); spell and pronounce words like “Cheektowaga,” “Lackawanna,” “Scajaquada,” and most Polish last names.

Things we hate hearing: “Oh, so you’re Canadian.” “You must be in New York City all the time.” And, “Wow, that must suck, huh?” Honorable mentions: “No goal!” and “Wide right.”

The least-true stereotype: That we get tons of snow, our winters are awful, it’s never not snowing, etc. You know, except that one time we got snow in October.

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Ashlynn Arias

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