The on-going national debate about condoms in public schools just got a lot more interesting.
The Provincetown, Mass. school district announced this week that condoms would be available to any and all who wanted them – in the entire district. This includes the likes of first and second-graders.
Now, I’m all for safe sex education. Condoms should be mandatory in high schools. We should explain to children how to use protection and that condoms are necessary for maintaining a safe and healthy lifestyle.
But what kind of message does this program send to the younger kids? Shouldn’t condoms come into schools after some years of sex education? Will this encourage experimentation in an age group that is absolutely not mature enough yet to deal with the emotional and mental strains of sex?
Apparently, that doesn’t matter.
“We know that sexual experimentation is not limited to an age, so how does one put an age on it?” said Superintendent Beth Singer, who wrote the policy unanimously passed two weeks ago by the Cape Cod town’s School Committee, as quoted in the Boston Globe.
So, while the eight-year-olds likely won’t ask for any prophylactics, upper middle-schoolers might. The idea of free condoms, without classes explaining how to use them, being available to curious and mid-pubescent tweens kinda freaks me out, despite promises of counseling by school nurses for those children who request condoms.
And, hey! What about the parents? I mean, if I, at 23-years-old and childless, am uncomfortable with this, I can understand why the Momosphere has gone crazy.
“My little guy just finished the first grade and he can barely aim his penis to pee without making a mess, much less do anything else with it… I can’t imagine our school nurse distributing condoms. That is just too shocking to even think about. She’s too busy taking care of kids throwing up and knocking teeth out on the playground,” says Momania.
“I am sickened at the thought of an elementary school passing out condoms to children. Babies…If Charlotte came home with a condom, I would be putting her in private girls education in 2.3 seconds, right after storming up to the school board with a piece of my bloggy mind,” says MomDot.
But, there is an argument to be made that getting to kids early isn’t necessarily a negative.
“If we are okay with teaching first graders to say no to drugs, why not teach them about safe sex?” said TNGG writer Jen Schmidt. “Early and often is the key!”
And she has a point.
It’s great that schools are promoting safe sex over unrealistic jibber-jabber like abstinence-only education. And for those children who might make use of programs like these, it may just be a life-saver.
A recent CDC survey found that in 2009, 34% of currently sexually active high school students did not use a condom during their last sexual intercourse and that pregnancy rates of 15-19-year-olds has risen for the first time since the 1990’s.
We need to focus our energy on bringing those statistics down again, and, hey, if passing out condoms for anyone who asks for one is the way to do it, then I guess I’m all for that.
As controversial as this topic is, I'm all about teaching safe sex to kids. I always got the abstinence talks in school (Catholic high school) and I always knew that what they were saying to me was basically crap. Everyone was having sex. They need to recognize that stop being so stupid.
The idea of condoms being available to first graders is strange and a bit uncomfortable, but does anyone really think that they're going to ask for one? It's better to have these things available to students rather than making them feel like they don't have any other option than to have sex without a condom.
This is a really really dumb idea. I'm sorry. There's that unrealistic abstinence-only stuff but then I think this is a step in the complete opposite direction. I think the key is age-appropriate, realistic education. I by no means grew up in a sheltered family or grew up to be a prude person, but I think that at that age a dumbed down, super-basic “when a man and a woman really love each other….” understanding of the whole thing is all I had and that I think is all you need at age 7.
Geez. Go learn your times tables and play with dolls. You have maybe thirteen years to be a little boy or girl and then you have rest of your life to deal with drama of dating, relationships, sex, and omfg the obgyn. I'm glad I stayed a kid as long as I could.
The US has got the highest teen pregnancy rate in the whole wide 'civilised' world (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Teenage_pregnancy), the military has a legal right to visit schools at any time, and you waste valuable internet storage and bandwidht on free condoms? (much pun intended)
Educate yourself please, think for yourself, become independent. You fought your way off of Britain centuries ago, but now you're owned by conservatism in general and religion in particular
Free your minds!
Last time I checked, it's against the law for children under the “age of consent” to have sex – meaning that a 15 year old child having sex with his/her boyfriend/girlfriend, as well as the parents, could result in rape charges. In some districts schools are required to report to DHS an underage child's sexual activity. I think that's perfectly appropriate. I don't know any high-schoolers, let alone middle- and elementary-schoolers, mature enough to raise a child. Giving a child access to condoms is not the same as teaching them the risks and responsibilities.
I am not a regular follower of your blog, but my friend sent this along to me as I focused on pregnancy prevention/STIs during my MPH program and now work as the teen health educator at a non profit.
So, diving right in – I challenge a lot of what I came across. first argument – condoms should be mandatory in high school. I read that as “access to contraceptives is important”, which I completely agree with. To go on to say that condoms will ruin the minds of our youth if they're exposed to these tools 'too early'? that's a little ridiculous. I gave a presentation to a group of moms last week who were hands down the most conservative group I've seen. I learned is that they have an open door policy in the bathroom with their children, so the issue of menstruation and puberty comes up. Do they hide their tampons and pads from their daughters? No! they explain that it's something for adults, and is apart of being a woman. Condoms should be treated in the same way. Keep them in your house, let your kids see them and ask questions. Condoms should be available and normalized, with the understanding that they are a tool for adults to use. Here's where the importance of age-appropriate discussions come in, because it is essential to give enough information to any age, but be sure you're not rocking their minds beyond what they're curious about. A 3 year old doesn't need the same details that a 7 year old would need. A 15 year old? Sure. Let them open the package, go through the PROPER steps of how to use one, and most importantly explain that condoms are THE only product out there that protect against pregnancy and STIs. Simple enough.
The argument that exposure to condoms will spawn experimentation is baseless, and has been a manipulative tool for anti sexuality proponents for years. Returning to the tampon idea – if a mom demonstrated to her young (pre pubescent) daughter how a tampon works, and why one is needed – is it going to cause her to begin menstruating?
Moving on. I am happy the language used didn't say that the condoms were passed out freely among the youth, and that they were simply available. That is the key. Students are able to freely visit the school nurse, request condoms, and prior to receiving any must go through some counseling about why they need one. At this point the nurse engages in a discussion about the benefits of abstinence, and how they feel about the choice to be sexually active. This is a pivotal component to the program, because the more sexuality, sex education and responsible decisions are discussed with youth (Starting from infancy up) in an age-appropriate manner, the more likely youth will delay the onset of sexual behaviors.
I understand the issue of sex is a tough one for our society to swallow, but we bombard our youth (everyone!) with messages of sex at the rate of hundreds a day through music, television, commercialism, etc and yet abhor the concept of talking about all the components of sexuality, health, and responsibility. I agree, it is difficult for everyone to think of such young people engaging in sexual acts, but we live in a country where we are not all equal. The majority of elementary students are not engaging in sex, nor should you fear that they will be. Instead it is important to think on a larger scale – because some students ARE engaging in sex, and they need the education and access to protect themselves accordingly. Perhaps through collective discussion about expectations, responsibility and educating our youth about sex, we will enter a new era in America where the average age of sexual debut stops getting younger each year, where we don't have 800,000+ teenage pregnancies annually, and where we can freely discuss the aspects of sexuality and how it makes us human. Maybe then condoms in elementary schools will be in lower demand.
Scary option, I don't think it should go down to the elementary level, middle school should be the lowest!
Clearly this makes no sense at all. But, look what it's doing. It has started a dialog and a conversation. People are talking, the press is buzzing, Mom bloggers and blogging. Perhaps that was the real point. To make it clear that as Jen Schmidt says, it's never too soon to talk about and educate our kids about sex. My daughter just finished the Unitarian Church's OWL program (our whole lives.) The class is more detailed and graphic than anything you can imagine. BUT, history has shown that kids who go through this program have more self respect, greater control over their own sexual lives, the confidence to say “no” and mean it, and pregnancy rates that are a fraction of kids who get a Catholic sex education. So do we need condoms in the first grade? Probably not. But we need the dialog and conversation.
I would answer that first graders are the children that need the information about the condoms the most. The percentage is staggering at the number of infections young children (many boys) are getting from their fathers, step-fathers, 'uncles' , their mothers live in boyfriends. It is quietly ignored by most medical people. These kids need that information because we are failing them, and they can't protect themselves. The introduction to condoms is an opening dialogue where they Might be able to find help from the schools… Incredibly sad situation.
Good for them. 1st or 2nd graders aren't going to ask for condoms. They don't even know what condoms are by that age. Even if they DID get a condom at that age, they wouldn't know what to do with it. It's just like another toy to them. Just because you give someone a shovel doesn't mean they're going to dig a hole. So all the moms should just chill out.
On the other hand, middle schoolers DO know what to do with condoms. Which is why sex education should happen earlier. In North Carolina we had sex education AND D.A.R.E (“say no to drugs”) all in the 5th grade, right before entering middle school. I think that's a perfect time because you're old enough to comprehend what they're teaching you but still young enough that most kids haven't started experimenting yet.
Yeah, and DARE really worked, didn't it? We have a bigger drug problem now than ever.