4 Tips for Fun Condom Sex

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If there is one thing this writer and most everyone else is sure about, it’s that hetero-sex with a condom can be lame! It feels so separated and impersonal, like showing up to a birthday party with a bag over your head.

Well, let’s put a stop to that. As sex week is upon us, here are some tried and true (by yours truly) ways to make sex with a condom like a ride you’ve never been on before.

So gear up and strap in with some of the best ways to make your romantic evenings with a condom as explosive as ever.

  1. Stick a marble in it. The first one is just like it sounds. Stick a marble in it. Before things get hot, heavy and rushed, place a marble casually on your bedside table (lady or gentleman) and when you’re ready to go, slip it in the condom. It is known that women have an elusive g-spot, which is something of a tricky dick to find, but with the help of the marble it’s not unfeasible. Let the marble rest just below the head of the penis and let it do the work. You’ll be in for a well-rounded experience.
  2. Be ready for a pre-me. Sometimes (guys, back me up) we know when it’s going to be a quick ride. We’re excited, ready to go and know that practically the minute after we slide that condom on and are inside, the show’s over. Here’s the trick: put about 2-3 cotton balls in the tip. This will allow guys to finish early and still “ride the limp” until the lady is satisfied. This is only for those times your man, or you guys out there, feel less than confident and want to be prepared for a good night for everyone.
  3. Slow down and treat yourself. Here’s one for the couples out there who are refining their sex with a condom. Moving towards sex can be hot and heavy and usually we just grab at a condom, knock everything to the floor and just cram it on there and go. Well, slow down! Buy yourself a Trojan Pleasure Pack (the Baskin Robins of condom packs) open it up when things start to get really hot and lay out all your options. Look at each one and read the descriptions and then decide as a couple which one fits your mood. Are you twisted? Is it her turn? Think about it for ten minutes or so and you’ll be on one hell of a ride.
  4. Stretching – it’s not just for muscles. One of the best things to do before having sex with a condom is to stretch it out and really let it fit your man (or if you’re a fella, let it be a part of you). A good way to do this is wear it around while you are starting to get aroused, this lets you grow into the condom rather than make the condom fit you. It makes for a better grip, too. Some guys might even want to have a “dry run” with the condom before using it for sex. Let me warn you, this usually doesn’t end up very dry.

In the end, sex with a condom doesn’t have to be lame or boring. Sex with a condom shouldn’t feel like a lubricated latex barrier separating two souls from one another. Rather, sex with a condom should feel like just an extension of the man, a second skin, if you will. It can be a new and fulfilling adventure every time! So find a pack that suits you and your partner and try something new. Never be afraid to experiment, the possibilities of the condom are endless.

Just remember, slow down, know your condom, know your partner and happy sexing!

Adam Hogue I discovered Neil Young and Green Day at the same time. My '96 Subaru Legacy died in Keene, New Hampshire. I wrote this magical realism piece last year that got published and now I am in South Korea listening to people in a different language.

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4 Responses to “4 Tips for Fun Condom Sex”

  1. Phillip Whidden

    “just below the head of the penis”? Please state it another way. I’m a bit thick. (ha Ha HA)

    Reply
  2. Public Safety

    How irresponsible are you? Are you a certified sex specialist? A health care provider? Putting a condom on before an erection won’t allow for space at the tip (needed for semen collection so it doesn’t run down the length of the condom) and can cause bubbles and bunching (also increases chances of breaking). A marble? Breakage. “Found your g-spot and your future wart site!” And you NEVER leave a condom on after you ejaculate, even with a cotton ball. Again, the cotton balls could lead to breakage. I hope anyone who contracts an sti or gets pregnant from your stupid misinformed “advice” sends you their medical bills. If you want to find the g spot that badly, strap on some gloves and do the work. Stop posting things that can get people infected!

    Reply

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